Pick Up Girls

Posts Tagged ‘David Deangelo’

The art of how to pick up girls is not difficult; all you need to do
is get a good grip beneath their shoulders and lift. I think even if it
was this easy, most guys still wouldn’t be able to do it because of all
the mental blocks they have: “What if I lift her and she thinks I’m
ugly? What if I lift her and then I don’t know where to take her? What
if there’s another guy who just lifted her recently and he’s a better
lifter?” Now when you consider that most guys are scared to death about
talking to a strange woman, you have a recipe for disaster. Fear not,
there is hope.

It is possible to learn how to attract and pick up women even if you have never done it before.
Sometimes it requires little adjustments to your personality, sometimes
big ones. Regardless, starting from any skill level, you can go from
“not being able to talk to a girl” to being very successful with women
in a short period of time by following some key concepts. One of the
best places to start is to hang out with men whom are successful with
women. By observation, osmosis and asking key questions, you can
improve your skill quite rapidly. If you don’t have the opportunity to
hang out with successful men, then the next best thing is to read books
by men whom are very successful with women. They will give you the
theory, the techniques and open your eyes to things that previously
seemed impossible. Allow me a blatant plug, but read “Double Your Dating” by David DeAngelo and it will change your life.

Concept 1 : When picking up a girl, you must be detached from the outcome.

If you care about what the girl thinks of you, you are destined to
fail. Let’s face it, there are going to be many girls that you are just
not compatible with. Many of them just won’t live up to your
expectations and you won’t live up to many of theirs. You must get over
this and not care if you succeed or get rejected. If you care, then you
will do everything you can NOT to screw up, and consequently, this
makes you screw up.

Concept 2: When picking up a girl, YOU are choosing her.

When you talk to someone for the first time, you must realize that
there’s a reason that you are talking to them. If you’re talking to a
woman for the first time, it’s likely that she already knows you’re
trying to pick her up. Many guys have tried to pick her up before and
many will in the future. This does not mean that she decides if she
will accept your approach or not. When you go shopping for a car, you
might walk into a dealership, but does that mean that you will purchase
the car? No way! The only way you’re going purchase the car is if it’s
a good investment and the salesman is competent. The same applies to
dating. When you go out and you meet a girl, keep in mind that YOU
won’t take her home unless you like her.

Concept 3: Be happy, enjoy what you do and she will too.

Many guys approach this as a horrifying experience when in reality,
it should really be a pleasurable one. If your objective is to find out
what kind of person this girl is and then make her smile, then you’re
likely to have many good and enjoyable interactions. If you try to
“win” by picking her up, you’re doomed for failure. Most of the time,
the best pick ups are when you aren’t even trying.

Concept 4: No immediate compliments!

What ever you do, do NOT compliment her on her looks. Paying
attention to detail is good, but as soon as you mention her physical
appearance, things start to turn ugly. If anything, you can mention her
clothing, accessories or anything out of the ordinary, but do NOT
mention her appearance. Even if she has the most beautiful eyes you’ve
ever seen, refrain from mentioning it. You can tell her later… much
later.

Concept 5: Building attraction immediately

In order to build attraction, you must be able to convey signs of a
good and desirable mate. These will naturally be present in men whom
workout often and are already successful with women. However, what if
you don’t have time to work out often and you aren’t already successful
with women ? Well these are traits that you can LEARN from other men.
After a while, they will become part of you and you won’t even have to
think of them. Honestly, the best way to learn them is to hang around
men that are successful. Otherwise, if you don’t have that opportunity
and you still want to learn how to pick up girls, I strongly recommend
reading the book Double Your Dating as it will give you all the keys to creating massive attraction instantly.

from wikiHow - The How to Manual That You Can Edit

There are plenty of people who are good at picking up girls…but they aren’t good at explaining what they do. Don’t fool yourself into thinking that you’re either destined to be good with girls, or you aren’t. This is a skill anyone can learn.

Steps

1. Don’t get sucked in to thinking that you can only find girls to date when you’re out at a party or at the bar. They’re on the street, in a store, in class, everywhere you go. Just go out into the world and pay closer attention.
2. Start by using what’s called a “neutral-opinion opener.” What that means is you ask her a question about something that has nothing to do with you. It can be simple (”What do you think of this place?”) or elaborate (”Did you see the fight outside? There were these two girls, and they were totally fighting over this guy…but the guy was really scrawny and wimpy looking…it was crazy…”) but it really doesn’t matter what you say.
3. Try to remain calm. Girls may be hit on almost every day, and they know why you came up to talk to them. They may not be paying attention to what you’re saying, and rather how you are saying it. For instance, she may look for:
   • Are you confident?
   • Comfortable?
   • Are your shoulders hunched over, or back?
   • Do your best to appear comfortable, and she’ll feel comfortable too. Being calm, cool, and in control is an advantage.
4. Do something original. A really pretty girl has people telling her all the time how hot she is, how cute she is, how nice she is. and she’s gotten used to empty compliments. If you become the next guy to come up and tell her how pretty she is, she’ll appreciate the compliment, but she won’t find you attractive. Remain calm and casual. Make a little joke at her expense. For instance, David DeAngelo would say something like “Wow, that’s a big purse! Do you have a gun in there?” or if she’s dressed up “I like your shoes…they look really comfortable”. Refrain from comments on her appearance.
5. Just be yourself. If you’ve ever asked a girl what to do to meet a girl, she’ll probably say “just be yourself.” You may think that means that if you feel nervous, and that you want to tell her again how pretty she is (for the 40th time) that you should, but that’s NOT what she means. She means to treat her normally almost like one of your guy friends. If you’re at the bar, and she asks you to get her a napkin, she’s probably just asking to see if you’ll jump through a hoop for her. Don’t do it! You wouldn’t break your back to do that for one of your good friends: don’t treat her differently!
6. Keep up the banter. Once you’re talking, keep it up. You may want to come up with some stories about you that are funny or interesting, or that display an interesting side to you. Try to not fall into the interview technique (asking things like: What do you do? Where do you live? Where did you go to school? If you’re stuck, turn those interview questions into statements, like “You look like you’re from New York” or “I bet you’re an event planner”)
7. Ask for her number. After a few minutes, if you’re having a good time, cut things off on a high note, and ask for her number. Say that you’re having a great time, but you need to get back to your friends (or whatever else you were about to do before you started talking to her). If she says she doesn’t want to give you her number, you can joke with her and say that you promise to only call her 50 times a day, but that’s all. You could also just get her email address (almost everyone has one, and is OK with handing it out, especially for a charming guy like yourself)
8. Text her as you’re leaving the venue, then call her the next day. The rule about waiting to call was made for guys who acted too needy on the first meeting. But here’s the deal: if you *were* too needy, waiting to call isn’t going to help all that much. And if you weren’t, there’s no reason you have to wait, and the girl is going to want to hear from you the next day.
9. Give her a nickname. If you call her “cutie” at the bar, then when you call her you can say “Hey, cutie… it’s me.” instead of “Umm, this is (your name). We met at the bar the other night.”

Tips

• Make sure you are always looking into her eyes. Girls hate it when you look at their breast or legs or whatever.
• Remember be calm cool and collected
• Practice – Practice really does make perfect. Practice talking to women in general throughout your day – whether you find them attractive or not. You’re not picking up these women, you’re just practicing talking to them. In fact, you might find it easiest to start by practicing talking to women you don’t want to go out with. Talk to the waitress or cashier. Talk to the women in line with you. Talk to the women waiting for the bus with you, or sitting next to you on the bus. Just practice. You’ll be surprised at how much more comfortable you’ll become talking to the women you want to be picking up when you’ve had ample practice talking to women who you don’t. Practice as well when by yourself, if possible in front of a mirror. Listen to how your voice sounds when you say “Hi” and introduce yourself. Watch you facial expressions and other body language.
• Relax – Get into the habit of doing something to calm your nerves every time you see a beautiful woman. Notice if any of your limbs are shaking nervously, or if you’re fidgeting, and make it stop. Breathe deeply several times, into the belly. You can even close your eyes for several seconds and do some peaceful, relaxing visualizations (if circumstances allow). Give yourself some calming affirmations to run through your mind when you see an attractive woman. No doubt, a certain degree of nerves is to be expected, and the right women find it cute. But too much anxiety reeks of insecurity and is a bigger obstacle to picking up women than anything you could possibly say wrong.

Warnings

• A lot of people, especially girls, don’t like the idea of learning how to pick up girls. They think it’s misogynist and cheap. There are pick up artists like this…but it doesn’t have to always be that way. Those same girls (if they’re single) are waiting for the right guy to sweep them off their feet…to charm them, and woo them and make them feel special and beautiful…and that’s what you can do with this kind of information if you use it wisely.
• Watch where your eyes are. DO NOT stare at her chest, or keep glancing away. Try to look into her eyes, but not too intensely, which may make her feel nervous.

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